The Moth Attack
by Godlovesme
Summary: DAmn the moths that fly in Harry's bedroom. What was once a one-shot now has a second chapter. Craziness will ensue.
1. the beginning

Harry Potter sat on his bed, with his computer on his lap.  
  
Since when did he have a computer?  
  
Since now dammit!  
  
As I was saying  
  
He was sitting on his computer, writing up a very interesting fanfiction about himself, and Draco Malfoy. Being the weirdo that he is, he was writing a romance fic.  
  
He loved Draco Malfoy  
  
Is that a crime?  
  
Well, while sitting and typing his wonderful fic (Harry and Draco Get It On In A Pepsi Factory) he was interrupted by a faint fluttering noise.  
  
"What in bloody hell was THAT?!" Harry exclaimed loudly.  
  
He looked around his room suspiciously. Perhaps Voldemort was here.  
  
Or perhaps not. . .  
  
How would he get here anyways, and if he was here, where was he? Under his bed? In the closet? No Voldemort had a little more dignity than that.  
  
Harry is kind of a dumbass, and blames everything on Voldemort.  
  
Ok, ok, I'm sorry for insulting a very important person to the Harry Potter Fan fiction genre, but! Inside Harry's room was a fluttering.  
  
Now, what flutters?  
  
Taking another look around he saw something on the wall.  
  
Something ugly  
  
Something small  
  
Something utterly annoying.  
  
A Moth.  
  
That's right, a freaking moth! And what was it doing now? It was sitting on his screen, twirling it's antennas around.  
  
No wait. . . that's a different moth. The other one is still on the wall.  
  
And.  
  
Oh god.  
  
There's a leaf colored one on the other wall.  
  
Listen these Moths must not be very smart.  
  
A) Moths have very small brains  
  
B) It's a leaf colored Moth  
  
C) It's a leaf colored Moth trying to camouflage into the WHITE FREAKING WALL!  
  
He hated moths  
  
They were the most detested things in the whole wide world.  
  
And what could he do?  
  
Well, he could go on a Moth killing rampage  
  
But Harry Potter doesn't kill things,  
  
No  
  
Not Saint Potter  
  
CAUSE HE'S A HERO!  
  
SO he leaves the moths, to fly and flutter around the room.  
  
Big mistake.  
  
Soon there are four more moths.  
  
Five more moths  
  
Add a dozen onto that  
  
Minus one, his owl ate it.  
  
Well, to make a long story longer, add about  
  
Fifty  
  
Plus  
  
Twenty  
  
Minus another one (the owl must be hungry)  
  
Plus two more.  
  
What do you get?  
  
How the hell should I know?  
  
What am I supposed to be keeping track?  
  
No, I don't think so.  
  
Lets just say  
  
There were a lot  
  
A Hell of a lot more than is tolerable  
  
SO he summoned  
  
THE MOTH KILLER!!!!!  
  
DUN DUN DUUUUUN!!!!  
  
"What the hell do you want Saint Potter," Draco Malfoy snarled.  
  
"You're the evil bad guy, kill these moths, for I'm a hero and I do not kill things," Harry ordered Draco.  
  
"You see, I think I want to be the bloody hero just once. I'm really not all that bad of a person." Draco protested.  
  
Silence  
  
Harry stares at Draco  
  
"I hate you," Draco muttered.  
  
Then he turned on Harry and killed him.  
  
"That's better, now lets see what he was writing?" Draco smiled, jumping onto Harry's bed and was reading the words on Harry's screen.  
  
"Interesting, I never even considered that before!" Draco gasped at Harry's writing.  
  
"I didn't know he had that in him!" Draco finished the book, now greatly regretting destroying Saint Potter.  
  
Oh well.  
  
Moral of the Story?  
  
Kill the moths yourself, or else Draco Malfoy will come and kill you.  
  
The End  
  
Author's note: If you didn't catch it, then I'm sure you will. I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER. Sorry I forgot to put that in the beginning, and I am way to lazy to do so now.  
  
Ok I know, that had to be the stupidest thing written EVER. And I am really sad that I did it, but it is 3 in the morning, and these stupid effing moths are everywhere. Plus there's a huge spider in the window, and the stupid green moth is still sitting on the stupid whilte wall. No wait. . . now it's crawling in to the Aquafina. Like I said, stupidest insects ever. AHH HUGE mosquito looking one. GOTTA GET OUT OF THIS ROOM NOW! BYE! 


	2. Passionate kissing almost

"Now how do I get this to work?" Draco Malfoy asked himself as he shook a cubed like object which he THOUGHT held the soul of the late Harry Potter, who, if you didn't catch it, was dead because Draco had killed him.  
  
Apparently reading Harry's story "Harry and Draco get it on the Pepsi Factory" had changed the way he looked at the gangly mussed up hair boy. He may not like the guy, but in truth, he really wanted to get in on that Sexy Pepsi Action.  
  
Draco sighed and threw the soul cube at the wall, why did he ever think that any of his plans would go right? Obviously there was some dissonance in the room either from the Anger of the Late Harry Potter, or from the Moths Antennae, and the cube wouldn't work unless it was in a perfectly peaceful place.  
  
That means that the cube hardly ever (maybe the word never is more suitable) worked because people are usually all torn up about dying. I mean. . . it's the end of your life. Are you supposed to take that lightly and peacefully? Of course not.  
  
Now you may be wondering what this cube IS. It's actually called a Soul Cube, and if you haven't caught on, it captures the souls of those who are recently dead, so that you may be able to bring them back. Most unfortunately it seems as though it didn't work because A) The cube wasn't glowing. It's supposed to glow  
  
B) the discord and conflict in the room  
  
C) There was a chip in the cube.  
  
Hmmmm. . . maybe if he lit the cube on fire. . .   
  
. . .   
  
alright bad plan.  
  
There was only one choice left, Kill the moths, and hope that the less souls there are in the room, the easier it will be to capture the soul of Harry before it drifts off into who-knows-where.  
  
Draco picked up a book from Harry's table (Noble House) and methodically thwacked every single moth in that room. And there were a lot of moths.   
  
"Bleck. . . ooooooooooooooh!" Draco looked at the book in disgust, and then noticed his lovely cube glowing. Bahaha, he was a genius. He took the cube, ran over to the late Harry Potter's body, and stuffed it down his throat. Not an easy feat, since the cube was about 2 inches on each side, and Harry's throat was a bit dry due to decomposition.  
  
Instantly there began a change. Infact that change went along the lines of Harry getting up, staring quizzically at Draco, shrugging, grabbing Draco and kissing him passionately on the lips.  
  
Draco being a hormonal teenage boy, kissed back.  
  
"Oh Potter."  
  
"Oh Draco."  
  
"OH POTTER."  
  
"OH DRACO."  
  
"Hey, stop tickling me behind my ear. I'm fine with kissing the enemy, but being tickled by him is going a bit far," Draco sniffed.  
  
"I'm not tickling you," Harry withdrew with a confused look on his face.  
  
Draco just stared at him with a horrific look on his face.  
  
"What, do I have something on my face?" Harry reached up towards his face.  
  
"You could say that," Draco scrambled backwards to the wall.  
  
"Eh?"  
  
"Look in a mirror Potter," Draco said, flicking on a nearby lamp.  
  
"OOOH LIGHT!" Harry immediately moved towards the light.  
  
"No no a mirror," Draco said pushing him towards the mirror on his dresser.  
  
"No I want to stay by the light!" Harry protested.  
  
"MIRROR!"  
  
"LIGHT!"  
  
"Oh god, it's getting worse." Draco put his hands over his eyes.  
  
"What?! What's wrong? What's getting worse?" Harry said pressing his face up near the glow of the lamp.  
  
"If you go near a white wall I'll have to kill you again," Draco threatened.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Just come look in the goddamn mirror," Draco said picking up the lamp and bringing it towards the lamp. Harry of course followed the light.  
  
"Now look," Draco pointed at the mirror. What Harry saw sort of horrified him.  
  
He was looking at himself. . . but he looked quite a bit different from what he used to look like. His eyes for one, were actually hundreds of eyes in one big clump. He had antennae, and unfortunately his whole body was green. Just like the moth who was camouflaging into the white wall.  
  
"I must have captured your soul, along with the hundred or so moths that I killed." Draco shrugged.  
  
"IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY?!" Harry asked.  
  
"Well. . . I did bring you back so we could have a quick shag, like the one you wrote in your story, but now that I've seen you. . . I don't think I really want to anymore." Draco said, turning to walk out the door.  
  
"If you leave me like this, I'll get my revenge. Oh believe me Malfoy, I will." Harry shook his fist.  
  
Draco laughed and left.  
  
"Oh shit," Harry said as the door closed, and he heard his Uncle Vernon wake up and begin to start the new day.  
  
- - - -   
  
A/N I was really bored.. and I thought I'd continue this. 


End file.
